We tend to recoil from pain. So we don’t easily learn from it. It can take repeated, prolonged encounters with the same form of pain before insight happens. From malfunctions in relationship, to taking things personally at work, to holding on to anger, to world wars. It’s the same problem: in recoiling from pain, we [...]
[Continue reading...]To relate to your pain you have to love yourself, part 1
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Without darkness there is no light. Without sorrow there is no joy. Without this there is no that blah blah blah. Blah. Whatever. That’s not the point. There’s little sense in trying to explain or understand the existence of pain unless you’re going to do something about it. The real constructive effort lies in learning [...]
[Continue reading...]To stay in the now you have to love yourself, part 5
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Presence is a kind of prayer state. The more present you are the more pure your experience of simple being. That’s what presence is: simple being with focused consciousness. You simply are. And you know it. Presence is not spooky or ghostly. There’s no buzz or euphoria. It’s nothing unusual. The fuller it is the [...]
[Continue reading...]Self love and staying in the now, part 4
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You can learn a lot from distraction. The thoughts that keep recurring. The desires that pull you. These things are information about how you are inside. About aspects of you that need expression and haven’t found it yet. In the present, if you observe, you’ll see your attitudes and orientations. The involuntary aspects of you [...]
[Continue reading...]To remain in the now you have to love yourself, part 3
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Fullness of life involves openness to whatever life hands you. Hard. Easy. Whatever. The only way to experience life with balance and completion is to be all in. Each aspect of you. Nothing left in the cupboard. Nothing ignored, rejected, forbidden, forgotten or lost. The fury, the lust, the child-like animation, the reliability, the volatility, [...]
[Continue reading...]To remain in the now you have to love yourself, part 2
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Authenticity is passive. Mostly. There are times when you have to actively be yourself. But there are aspects of authenticity you can’t “do.” You cannot deliberately experience joy, for example. You can only allow it to happen. And experiencing joy is part of being you. No matter what you might think to the contrary. (If [...]
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To remain in the now, you have to love yourself
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The past is one second ago. The future is one second away. The now is now, and only now. No matter when that is. No matter what’s going on. And the now is where everything happens. It can be a painful, scary place. And it can be ecstatic. Or it can be calm, steady, almost unnoticeable. [...]
[Continue reading...]Self love is crucial to developing your talents, part 2
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Fullness of life is our birthright. It’s why we’re here. And few of us have ever managed to claim it. Because of what it involves. Which is exactly what it sounds like. Fullness. Not survival. Not subsistence. Not getting by. Not even reasonable comfort or even opulence. Fullness of life includes satisfaction and appropriate challenge [...]
[Continue reading...]Self love is crucial to developing your talents, part 1
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Devoting time and energy to a talent or an idea is an indicator that self love is present. Developing your talents is crucial to discovering, experiencing and revealing who you really are. If you are not doing this, then huge regions of your being go unexplored and your sense of self is not what it [...]
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